The gratitude project.

I'm trying to teach my boys about gratitude.  In a world full of always expanding technology, worldly experiences, and endless possibilities there is an overarching sense of entitlement amongst kids these days.  One way that I keep myself grounded is by keeping a gratitude journal and I decided to extend that practice to the boys as well.  Every day we sit down and make note in our shared journal about what we are grateful for.  At first the practice was met with resistance, eye rolling, and a chorus of "this is stupid".  But as it's become a routine in our house I've noticed a definite shift.  Instead of just blurting out the first thing that comes to mind they are thinking about their answers more. They want their responses to be unique and interesting.  I'm really proud of them for being engaged and keeping up with it. If nothing else, it gives us all a moment of pause every day and a chance to realize there is always something to be grateful for.  

When "NOW" is never enough.

We all have goals.  Aspirations.  Bucket lists.  "Some days". But how often do we get caught up?  Always waiting for the next weekend.  The next vacation.  The next "big thing" to happen to us.  When we are always focused on the future... or the past for that matter... we miss out on enjoying where we are right now.  In this moment in time.  Where the Universe has placed us.  Here for a reason.  Living and experiencing th world around us.  To teach us something.  To lead us where we need to be led.  But our minds are somewhere else.  Our minds are focused on what's to come.  But what's to come is not guaranteed.  All we are guaranteed is the moment we are in.  Embrace it.  Cherish it.  Live it.  Because "some day" you may need this "now" to fully appreciate and experience the moments that are waiting for us...

Practice for peace not perfection.

Practice daily, they say.  You'll be better for it, they say.  Practice makes perfect, they say.  I say, "ain't nobody got time for that!".  I don't know about you but my life is no short of chaotic.  Three kids, full time job with travel, basketball practice, family and friends, house to clean, lunches to pack, clothes to wash... and that's just the beginning.  My day starts and ends at a different time every day and consistency?  Well that's something I ask Santa for every year and he has yet to deliver.  My practice is sporadic at best.  Sprinkled in here and there as I can.  Sure I'd love to practice yoga and meditation every day but the reality is that just isn't my life.  Part of my mindfulness practice is appreciating any time that I do have to devote to my practice and acknowledging myself for taking that time for me.  Instead of beating myself up for skipping a day or only spending five minutes meditating I recognize that any time is better than no time at all.  My practice isn't perfect but it's personal.  It's not about checking a box but about being the best version of myself that I can be.  You can't do it every day?  You only have five minutes?  That's ok.  Do what you can when you can and then give yourself a big pat on the back for taking time for yourself.  It's an evolution.  It's called a "practice" for a reason.  You don't need to be perfect.  You just need to be you!

Let it go

"Finish each day and be done with it.
You have done what you could.
Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can.
Tomorrow is a new day.
You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense."
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

No doubt we've all had bad days.  And not just one or two but the full spectrum of bad days from bad hair days to how am I going to survive this? days.  They happen.  I spent years pretending I wasn't having bad days.  If I ignored them I thought they would go away.  But one thing I've learned is that you cannot move past a feeling without actually feeling it.  If you feel it, it gets processed within minutes and is over and you can move on.  If you hold back and fight it then the feelings fester.  They live inside of you, trapped, building up on top of each other.  Until you have no choice but to feel them all at once.  And that is a really bad day.  Acknowledging your feelings, good or bad, is one of the most powerful tools a person can possess.  Own it.  Feel it.  Embrace it.  And then move on.  Have the bad days.  But don't let bad days define you.

Rumi has it...

Rumi is my favorite poet.  His works are so inspirational and, although 13th century, relevant even today.  Some of his quotes are among the most uplifting I've ever read.  They are incredibly powerful.  Below are some of my favorite Rumi quotes.  I hope you enjoy them as much as I do.

"You are not a drop in the ocean.  You are the entire ocean in a drop."

"There is a voice that doesn't use words.  Listen."

"Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world.  Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."

"Let the beauty of what you love be what you do."

"Let yourself be silently drawn by the stronger pull of what you really love."

"What you seek is seeking you."

"Yesterday is gone and its tale told.  Today new seeds are growing."

And my favorite:

"Raise your words, not voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder."

Stone Meditation for Kids

One of my favorite meditations to do with children is a stone meditation.  The practice involves sitting each child cross legged on the floor with four stones in front of them.  Each stone represents a different element - air, water, earth, and fire.

Encourage the child(ren) to close their eyes and pick up one stone at a time.  Let them know which element each stone represents and which attributes are symbolic of that element.  Ask them to feel each attribute and imagine that they possess each one.  This will encourage them to use their imagination and will boost self confidence and self awareness.

You can conclude the exercise with a reflection.  Asking each child how they felt, which attributes they feel the strongest about, and which stone was their favorite.

Basic instructions:

Pick up your first stone.  Think about how this stone feels in you hand.  This stone represents air.  Air is cool and calm.  It moves freely and softly.  Imagine that you are air.  Imagine how cool and calm you can be.  Feel the air around you.  Imagine that you are one with the air.

Pick up your second stone.  Think about how this stone feels in your hand.  This stone represents water.  Water is fluid and flexible.  It moves easily.  Imagine that you are water.  Imagine how flexible you are and how easily you can move around.  Imagine the last time you were in water - in the bathtub, or the pool, or the ocean - and how the water felt.  Imagine that you are one with water.

Pick up your third stone.  Think about how this stone feels in your hand.  This stone represents the earth.  The earth is strong and stable.  It is the base for everything that exists around us.  Imagine that you are the earth.  Imagine how strong you are.  Imagine the feeling of the stable earth under your feet.  Imagine that you are one with the earth.

Pick up your fourth stone.  Think about how this stone feels in your hand.  This stone represents fire.  Fire is warm and glowing.  It provides heat and light.  Imagine that you are fire.  You are warm and full of light.  Imagine the feeling of warm fire.  Imagine that you are one with fire.

Reflection:
How did the stones feel?
Did each one feel different or did they feel the same?
Which stone was your favorite? Why?
Which stone do you wish you were more like?

My WHY!

My life is nothing short of crazy.  I have three boys - Cam (11), Grady (7), and Owen (5).  They all have larger than life personalities, are very sarcastic, and are too smart for their ages.  I can barely keep up.  I'm already uncool and technologically inferior.  But they are my "WHY" for everything I do in life.  I want to be better for them.  And I want the world to be better for them.  My hope is for them to live in a world that is kind, accepting, open for them to explore, and challenging in all the good ways.  I want them to see and experience all that life has to offer.  And my goal is to teach them to be humbled by experiences and grateful for all that they have.  If you are wondering why this blog?  They are my why.